Advice For Friends
One in three teens reports knowing a friend or peer who has been hit, punched, kicked, slapped or physically hurt by a partner, and 45% of girls know a friend or peer who has been pressured into having either intercourse or oral sex.1
Someone experiencing dating abuse is often more likely to talk to friends than to school counselors or parents. If you think a friend is being abused by their boyfriend or girlfriend, learn about dating violence and then talk to them.
What to do:
- Offer support and just listen.
- Talk to them in private and keep what they say between the two of you.
- Tell them that you are concerned for their safety.
- Help them develop a safety plan. An advocate can be helpful with this.
- Support the decisions that they make, even if you don’t agree with them.
- Offer to get information for them and point out some people they could talk to (such as a counselor, teacher or coach).
- Give them the number for the NYS Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline: 1-800-942-6906 (English) or 1-800-942-6908 (Spanish) and offer to stay with them while they call.
What NOT to do:
- Wait for your friend to come to you.
- Give advice.
- Pressure them into doing something they don’t want to do (like ending their relationship).
- Judge or blame them.